Author: Jythier
Virtua – A new presidential by-law destroying all that is good and holy about Virtua has recently been passed by Tuned, exempting the government from the ability to commit a crime. Evelyn Houston, Researcher for the Department of Education, explains:
“The bylaw put forth states that ‘Supporting, planning, executing or any other form of supporting criminal activities by members of the Council or the Virtuan Government is not considered as a criminal activity.’ The purpose of this is to allow the Council and Virtuan government to support, plan, and execute criminal activity. For the Council and the mayors, we’re living in Digitalie.”
The utter ludicrousness of this proposal is preposterous. What is the government planning? If the government support criminal activity by a non-governmental entity, does it then become non-criminal, or is it still criminal?
Some Virtuan citizens are concerned. “We all came here; we agreed to abide by certain rules. Now the government is saying that they get a different set of rules than the rest of us. Expect your goods to be stolen, your article-writers to be planked, and your banks robbed. I mean, just look at Rats!. That guy is itching to get funds, any way possible.”
Whether this new by-law will truly affect anything has yet to be seen. President Tuned is putting it forth within a set of anti-invader laws, designed to keep Cyberian traders from dumping in Virtuan cities. President Tuned has not been seen with any firearms or explosives, causing us to suspect he has concealed them cleverly on his person. President Tuned was also not seen robbing the bank in Nasdaqar and getting away with hundreds of your hard-earned dollars. He most certainly did not cause any explosions in Cashington recently.
However, some are saying the government has been committing criminal activities for much longer. Value-added-tax, or sales tax, is widely considered normal and necessary for the running of government affairs. The definition of stealing, “Taking things that belong to others, except VAT,” very much shows that VAT would be stealing were it not specifically excluded. This is much like the way criminal activity counts, unless of course you’re a government official.
Officials are expected to arrest themselves sometime today or tomorrow.